Muddles, Puddles and Sunshine - Paperback: Your Activity Book to Help When Someone Has Died (Early Years)

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Muddles, Puddles and Sunshine offers practical and sensitive support for bereaved children. Beautifully illustrated, it suggests a helpful series of activities and exercises accompanied by the friendly characters of Bee and Bear. Coping with bereavement and Loss is a group sessions that spans half or a full day, it’s a group that is delivered on special occasions such as Christmas time and looks at different ways of coping with the feelings children tell us they experience after a death at these times. We are often asked whether a child, especially a very young child, should attend a funeral. This is not a straightforward decision and is an individual choice for parents and carers – you know your children’s needs. However, our experience tells us that for some young children, it can be really helpful to be included in a funeral. It can help them understand the significance of what has happened and, when they are older, the memories can help inform their understanding. A funeral is a time for people to say goodbye when someone has died. The body of the person is put in a coffin, which is something special to carry a body in. People choose music and words that the person would have liked to remember them.” Children learn through play and storytelling so using these tools and activities can really help. Our book Muddles, Puddles and Sunshine has lots of activities you can do with your children to help them cope with their grief – here are a couple of them: Fizzing feelings bottle:

What a fantastic book. Practical, sensible and fun – it should prove an invaluable tool for those of us whose jobs involve helping and supporting bereaved families.” —Dr. Mark Porter MBE, medical broadcaster and local GP Cruse Bereavement Care: Resources, information and helpline, supporting people who have been affected by the pandemic especially. Art Therapy is a group that runs for 8 weeks. It is suitable for children/young people aged 11+ and offers a creative space to express difficult emotions and underlying anxieties. Using art materials to show themselves and other people how they are feeling. There are some children’s books which some families, carers and professionals have found helpful to support young children who are grieving.Muddles, Puddles and Sunshine offers practical and sensitive support for bereaved children. Beautifully illustrated, it suggests a helpful series of activities and exercises accompanied by the friendly characters of Bee and Bear. Muddles, Puddles and Sunshine’ is a bereavement and loss group that runs for 6 weeks. It is for those who have experienced the loss of a loved one and is delivered to small groups of up to 4 children /young people due to the nature of the group.

A memory box is a special place that your child can keep and treasure all kinds of things that can remind them of the person who has died. This might be drawings, photographs or objects. Some very young children may not have many memories so these items can help you talk to them about the person who has died in the future. For example shells from a holiday might be a reminder of happy times spent together. Bounce is a group that runs for 7 weeks it is suitable for children age 7-11 and delivered to groups of 6 during the school day. Bounce is a group for children who have experienced family breakdown; who may be struggling to deal with their parents separating, and therefore loss of a family member (parent, sibling, grandparent, etc). Currently on hold due to Covid 19

As a family, grieving can be very difficult and there may be new challenges along the way. As a child grows and develops there will be new questions and things to consider. They will begin to understand more about death and so you can begin to give them more information about the death of their loved one. This book is an invaluable outlet for bereaved children and is likely to become a treasured and personalised keepsake. We cannot praise this book highly enough for its combination of enjoyable activities with its comforting words and therapy. Highly recommended.

This simple activity that can help to show young children how feelings can get all mixed up and can be explosive. Shake a bottle of fizzy drink and then take the lid off to show how feelings can burst right out. You could encourage your children to name their own feelings that might be ‘all mixed up’. Then repeat the activity with another bottle, but this time release the lid slowly and show that feelings can also come out in a more managed way. You can talk about the different feelings as they are released. For very young children they might only be able to name very simple feelings such as ‘happy’ or ‘sad’ but this activity can begin to encourage discussion around feelings. Making a memory box: With a little know-how anyone can transform a few basic ingredients into a delicious, sustaining loaf of bread. Baking Bread with Children has everything you need to share the magic of baking with children of all ages.

At the funeral, Mummy’s body will be in the coffin, it will come in a big special car and all the grown-ups will carry it inside. There will then be a special service with words and music to remember Mummy. Afterwards, we will go outside and the coffin will be placed in a big hole in the ground, then covered with flowers and soil.” Everybody develops their own coping mechanisms with unavoidable tragedies and bereavement, but for some children, if it is their first time dealing with such a situation, they have no previous experience of how to process it and the emotional consequences can be overwhelming. If a child is going to attend a funeral, then they need to be prepared for what to expect. So, spend some time talking to them about what they might see or hear, and explain things like a burial or cremation. For example you could say: We need to show young children the difference between dead and alive and using nature can be a useful way to help them understand death. You could encourage your children to look at the differences between dead and alive insects or plants and ask them questions like: A challenging experience can make a young child feel as if they are in emotional free fall. As a parent, you can’t stop them falling, but you can offer them a softer landing:

If you notice that your child is struggling, help them to name their own emotions too, for example: Lots of people will be feeling really sad, as they miss Mummy. They might be crying but that is ok. People might also be smiling or laughing when they remember happy times but that is ok too.” Side by Side is a group that runs for 3-4 weeks. It is suitable for Children/young people aged 6-10 and their families. It is for those having difficulty in family/peer relationships, emotional skills and social skills. It can be used where there has been a significant event such as a bereavement loss or trauma and is based on the five ways to wellbeing. There are separate children, young people and adult groups that run simultaneously, then there is a family session which joins the children, young people and adults together. We also help the adults who are caring for young grieving people, including parents, school staff and healthcare professionals, through information, resources, training and on-demand services. Records the default button state of the corresponding category & the status of CCPA. It works only in coordination with the primary cookie.These examples from nature can help young children to begin to understand the difference between dead and alive people too, and help them slowly start to piece together understanding. How might children’s grief change as they get older? The death of a parent or sibling is a devastating experience for any child and often adults don’t know what to say or how to support them. If your child is under five then this can be even more difficult because they might not understand what has happened or be able to express their feelings. The expert team at Winston’s Wish offers their advice on how to tell a very young child that someone has died, how to help them express their feelings and whether they should attend the funeral. Should I tell a young child about the death of a parent or sibling? Reboot is a group that runs for 7 weeks it is suitable for children who are experiencing anxiety and helps to learn techniques to cope with these anxieties. We hope that you have found something on this document that has helped. If you have any suggestions for further information, or if you would like to share your own personal experiences with any of the books or resources you use then please do. Additionally, if you want to talk to someone, ask for advice, or have a question we have a number of Facebook groups specifically for parents and for teachers.