Vibratissimo “Hot Moments” Warming, Soothing Massage Oil, Erotic Love Oil

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She went into the massage room, took off her clothes, and tried to relax. The masseur put on the same CD as before: a muzak version of Radiohead’s greatest hits, played on xylophone. As the instrumental version of “Creep” played, the massage began like the other one had before. But this time, when he got to her butt and inner thighs, she didn’t clench. He started rubbing her butt vigorously with his thumbs. “And then he just started rubbing closer and closer [to my vagina],” Tanya recalls. “I was like, ‘I wonder if he’s gonna do it?’”

Like, on my genitals for an hour? I don’t know how that’s gonna go,” Cookie responded incredulously, glancing at the Hitachi Magic Wand. But her goal that day was to have an orgasm, so she was game.

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After the dinosaur role play, he explained the massage that he’d be giving her that afternoon. “My goal is to try to use this vibrator on you for 45 minutes to an hour,” Stewart said.

After that exercise, Stewart led Cookie to the massage room and told her to take off as much of her clothing as she wanted. Then he told her to command him to touch her where she wanted to be touched. “I was such a scaredy cat,” she recalls. She was afraid to instruct him to do anything sexual. So why would a woman pay for sex? Despite the stereotype that ladies can get laid whenever they want, the truth is more complicated. “Women buy sex because they want sex that they can control,” explains Caldwell. “Some women want casual sex and feel safer with a negotiated service. Others want a sexpert who might better understand their needs. Sex workers are unlikely to reject, belittle, or harass their clients, and many women who previously tried online dating prefer the convenience and consistency that commercial sex offers.” Your most important massage tool is lotion or oil, since this will help your hands glide more easily along your partner’s body, Pasciucco notes. Just make sure you review the ingredients first, especially if either of you has skin allergies or fragrance sensitivities.

Happy ending” massages that include being stimulated to orgasm are not usually associated with female clientele. But there are indeed women seeking out this type of service from male masseurs, and their rules of engagement might surprise you. In December of last year, Tanya entered a strip-mall massage parlor in a ritzy Houston suburb—the same parlor she’d been going to for 11 years for traditional massage services, sometimes with her ex-husband. As she stood at the counter, the receptionist assigned her a male massage therapist. A 30-something woman waiting behind her piped up and said, “Oh, you’re getting him! He’s wonderful!” Tanya didn’t think much of it.

IT WAS the first day of our honeymoon in Hong Kong and my new wife, Sarah, talked me into getting a massage. Stewart is married to a man, something that his client Cookie tells me is appealing to her. “It just makes it feel so much safer for me,” she says. This may not have been what massage school had taught him, but it was a lot more fun than kneading a lower hamstring. So, he put an ad on Craigslist offering massage with a picture of himself: buff and beautiful. She’d learned from Reddit that when men are at a parlor, they don’t really have to ask for a happy ending. The masseuse would ask them, make a gesture toward their penis, or sometimes, “the men would have an erection and that was the indicator for the masseuse to offer it,” says Tanya. “It seemed so simple. But as a female, I was like, ‘How do I indicate? And do I even want that?’ And then part of me worried, ‘What if I get one and then I get arrested?’” T anya, a white, 34-year-old mom, is one of the many women across the U.S. risking arrest for a happy ending.

T hough our patriarchal culture likes to pretend that women don’t buy sex and men don’t sell it to them, it wasn’t difficult to find sources for this story once I figured out where to look. Now when you go break it down like that it kinda looks worse than it is but on the surface, I had been violated. And no one told me I should keep my clothes on. According to the Association of Certified Sexological Body Workers, this therapeutic method involves, “active receiving, anal touch, internal and external genital mapping, breathwork, scar tissue remediation, and orgasmic yoga coaching.” And yes, much of it involves bringing clients to orgasm. Stewart says that one of the keys to sexological bodywork is one-way touch: the therapist touches you and you don’t reciprocate. Once she arrived, Cookie became a bit nervous, but Stewart brewed her a cup of tea, they chatted, and she began to relax. Then they moved to the floor, and Stewart began stretching and rolling like a cat and instructed Cookie to do the same. “Even that was hard, honestly,” she says, “just wiggling around on the floor with a stranger I had just met.”

After having a free, 30-minute Zoom call in which Stewart led her in breathwork and explained that his bodywork “can bring up a lot of hormonal responses that can confuse us into feelings,” but that there would be no romance, Cookie booked a three-day retreat. A month later, she was on a two-hour ferry ride to Victoria to meet Stewart. Some women want casual sex and feel safer with a negotiated service. Others want a sexpert who might better understand their needs. I ended up finding a little place on the third level above the salon. It was real clinical looking. Almost like a little doctor surgery.

More massage tips

Once your partner is situated, find a position for your own body that you won’t mind holding for a while. You can sit beside your partner, pull up a chair next to the bed, or—if you want to heat things up right away and this works for both of you—straddle your partner while you oil up your hands and prepare to caress their stress away.