Sneaky Poo

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A normal bowel pattern can range from several times a day to several times a week. It’s a good idea to pay attention to what your bowel habit is.

Urinary symptoms such as daytime and/or nighttime wetting, or urine infections as a consequence of constipation or soiling, can be common. This practice also tends to create a lighter atmosphere wherein children are invited to be inventive in dealing with their problem, instead of being so immobilized by blame, guilt, or shame that their parents are required to carry the full burden of problem-solving. As White (1988/9, p.6) has commented, externalizing conversation “frees persons to take a lighter, more effective and less stressed approach to ‘deadly serious’ problems.” Roth, S. & Epston, D. (1996a). Consulting the problem about the problematic relationship: An exercise for experiencing a relationship with an externalized problem. In M. Hoyt (Ed.) Constructive therapies: Volume 2., (148-162). New York: Guilford.

This is done using softening and stimulating laxatives, which may initially be at frequent, high doses. It will be messy initially as the old stool comes out so it is best to keep the child home from school while this part of the treatment is carried out. Epston, D., & White, M., &“Ben” (1995). Consulting your consultants: A means to the co-construction of alternative knowledges. In S. Friedman, (Ed.), The reflecting team in action: Collaborative practice in family therapy. (pp. 277-313). New York: Guilford.

White, M. (1993). Commentary: The histories of the present. In S, Gilligan & R. Price (Eds.), Therapeutic Conversations (pp. 121-135). New York: Norton. a paper and songs by David Denborough. First published in Clinical Psychology, issue 17, September 2002 The term narrative implies listening to and telling or retelling stories about people and the problems in their lives. In the face of serious and sometimes potentially deadly problems, the idea of hearing or telling stories may seem a trivial pursuit. It is hard to believe that conversations can shape new realities. But they do. The bridges of meaning we build with children help healing developments flourish instead of wither and be forgotten. Language can shape events into narratives of hope. White, M. (1986). Negative explanation, restraint and double description: A template for family therapy. Family Process, 25(2), 169-184.The bowels play an important role in maintaining your child’s general health from birth. Poo can tell us a lot about our body such as are we drinking enough and eating enough fibre. For the child, externalization is like playing a game of “pretend.” Implicitly, or sometimes even explicitly, we are saying to the child, “Let’s pretend the problem is outside yourself and we’ll play with it from there.” As Paley (1990, p. 7) writes, “‘Pretend’ often confuses the adult but it is the child’s real and serious world, the stage upon which any identity is possible and secret thoughts can be safely revealed.” We have strong muscles in our large bowel that squeeze poo along (this movement is called peristalsis). As it travels through the bowel, water is removed turning poo into a smooth sausage shape. Problems with wetting are less common than soiling. The three main causes of daytime wetting ( known medically as enuresis) are:

The more puzzling and difficult children to deal with are those with no apparent physical problem, and who do not suffer from constipation, but who pass small amounts into their pants most days. It is easy to see this kind of soiling as having a psychological cause, but my impression has always been that there must be some kind of subtle physical factor which affects bowel sensation and/or control in these children because of the chronic and persistent nature of their soiling, and in the absence of any obvious psychological cause. If your child is pooing their pants (soiling) because they're constipated, a GP can prescribe laxatives to clear out the hard poo and get your child pooing regularly and comfortably again. Your child needs to believe that their poo will not hurt them anymore. Many children will not trust it when they are told their poos are ok now, they need to feel it for themselves. Take a look at our information on supporting children who feel scared of poo.

FAQs

When your child’s poo is reliably soft, you can start working on reassurance and confidence building. When they enter therapy overwhelmed by a problem, members of the family may expect that the clinician will discover further underlying conflicts in their minds or relationships. Therapists take an active role in shaping the attributions that are used to describe young persons and families and to explain their problematic situations, and when a therapist listens to, accepts, and then furthers the investigation of a pathological description of a child, the child’s identity may suffer. Going into denial. You child may say: "I don't need a poo and I haven't had an accident" when you can clearly smell that they have! This is a classic stress response to a situation they feel embarrassed about but don't know how to stop or control.